Romance scams – where scammers create fake identities and use dating or friendship to get your trust and money – cost Australians $201 million last year.
But the emotional impact of romance scams can often feel worse than losing money. People who have been cheated on may experience embarrassment and shame and have difficulty accepting that the relationship was not real.
People who have suffered a brain injury, for example after a stroke or car accident, may be more vulnerable to these scams. My research with colleagues shows that they are often less aware of scams and find it harder to recognize red flags.
But our project has found that there are benefits when people with brain injuries who have been victims of fraud share their experiences. This can create awareness, reduce stigma, and help prevent future scams.
Some groups are more vulnerable
Anyone can be cheated. But some groups are at greater risk, including people with disabilities such as brain injury.
We surveyed 101 therapists in Australia and New Zealand who work with people with brain injuries. More than half (53%) of customers were affected by cyber scams. The most common type was the romance scam.
How do romance scams work?
Romance scams involve a scammer (or sometimes several people) exploiting someone by luring them into a fake relationship, often in order to get money. Scammers may use online dating platforms or social media, gaming, and even online shopping sites to connect.
Romance scammers build trust and strong feelings by using techniques such as love bombing (early and repeated declarations of affection), prolonged grooming, and manipulation. They share similar interests and even similar types of traumas to get people to trust them. As a romance scam survivor who suffered a brain injury explained:
My way of thinking was a little skewed because I only saw love, money, all the things I wanted, so I didn’t worry about all the other little things.
Scammer identities usually appear very attractive and trustworthy but are often fake, stolen from a real person or AI-generated. They present a lot of evidence and exciting details about their everyday lives to make it seem real and keep people engaged in the relationship.
Scammers use pre-written scripts containing compelling stories describing significant financial success, being widowed or orphaned, or working abroad to attract people. Flirty language and flattery encourage people to maintain communication with the scammer. They may tell you that they think your smile is beautiful and that their dog or cat will love you.
Scammers will invest weeks and months to build a relationship, then the scammer will present exciting “opportunities.” These may include investments and requests to cover international flights for the first meeting. Or paying the medical bills of a sick relative. As one scam survivor who suffered a brain injury explained:
She was really jumping into a kind of quite intimate relationship with me, even though we haven’t met yet, but she’s promising that we will meet one day. I just want to send money.
Why are people with brain injuries at greater risk?
One in 45 Australians lives with a brain injury sustained during an event such as a car accident or stroke. It can damage a specific part of the brain, widespread brain cells (neurons), or both.
The impact of a brain injury varies but can affect cognition, emotions, behavior, and neurological functioning. As a result, people may experience changes in their ability to care for themselves, work, socialize, and make complex decisions.
Cognitive difficulties – such as memory problems and reduced information processing – can make it harder to learn, notice, and respond to scam red flags in real time. People may have difficulty understanding new or complex information, have impaired decision making and become more impulsive.
Like other vulnerable Australians, people with brain injuries may be bored, lonely and in need of care. This may mean that scammers’ constant online availability, messages, attention, praise, and acceptance are even more attractive regardless of the person’s disability.
shame and embarrassment
People with brain injuries may also struggle to move from knowing or intending to do something to actually implementing that behavior. This is called the frontal lobe paradox. As one of our interviewees explained:
I have some big feelings and then I forget about it, like… ‘Don’t do that again’. And then I go and do it again.
When the scam is exposed, family, friends and frontline services such as the police and banks may react with blame, judgment and ridicule. This further contributes to the crisis:
They just say how stupid I was to be deceived.
Scams are likely to be under-reported to authorities such as Scamwatch due to embarrassment and lack of awareness of scams.
Families and physicians of people with brain injuries may cut off or reduce their access to money or the Internet, which increases the financial and emotional impacts of the scam.
As one physician explained:
The depression (…) did not come from being scammed. It came from the complete opposite, almost as if she (…) feels that it is her right to have access and to leave herself open to those things.
Authentic partnerships with people with lived experience
Our research team has developed a suite of tailored resources called CyberAbility, which was co-designed with people who have brain injuries and experience fraud. We call them “Scumbassadors.”
Scammers reduce some of the stigma and shame associated with scamming by holding community education sessions, speaking to the media, and co-facilitating therapy groups. They also spread awareness to other people with brain injuries about what they should look out for – but the advice is useful for everyone.
You may want to look out for signs that someone in your life has been scammed. This may include a new unrequited lover, a large unexpected purchase or loan, or increased privacy about online activities.
Approach difficult conversations about potential scams with curiosity, care, and patience. Share your experiences of scams or fraud to normalize it and reduce judgment.
No matter who runs the scam, the real blame lies with the criminals who perpetrate this fraud. But discussing scams regularly can help reduce stigma and protect our community.
,Author: Kate Gould, Senior Research Fellow and Clinical Neuropsychologist, Monash University)
,disclosure statement: Kate Gould has received grant funding from the Transport Accident Commission, Lifetime Support Authority, Summer Foundation, AUDA Foundation and Monash University.)
This article is republished from The Conversation under a Creative Commons license. Read the original article.
(Except for the headline, this story has not been edited by NDTV staff and is published from a syndicated feed.)
