We all know someone, be it a friend or a family member, who was destined to end a relationship with their long-term partner, but the relationship suddenly ended. Then, almost in the blink of an eye, they marry someone else and start living their ‘happily ever after’ life.

This is not just limited to us common people, many celebrities have also taken the same path (You can probably think of some,

But the question is, is it healthy to take this step so soon after a breakup? Should one even think of entering into another relationship, let alone marriage, so soon after the end of a serious long-term commitment? Find out from the experts.

recovering from heartbreak

Shows like ‘Sex and the City’ and ‘How I Met Your Mother’ have popularized the idea that getting over a breakup takes half the duration of a relationship. However, studies and surveys show that full recovery can take anywhere from three to six months.

But for Delhi-based relationship counsellor Ruchi Ruh, there is no single answer to how long it takes to heal completely after a relationship ends.

“Every relationship is different and has a different ending. Factors that make it different for each person are the depth and length of the relationship, how much you invested in it, how it ended (mutually, through infidelity or misunderstanding), how well you handle difficult situations, your grief coping skills and what kind of support system you have,” she explains. india today,

“Recovering from a breakup can take anywhere from a few weeks to years, depending on how much shock you are after it. Again, this is different for everyone because healing is non-linear, and the grief from a breakup can come in waves,” Ruh adds.

Aarti Chawla, a Mumbai-based relationship therapist and life coach, agrees that recovery depends on the depth of the trauma experienced by a person.

“Sometimes you have other things to fall back on, like a successful career, family, or friends. Then it becomes easier, and you can bounce back in no time. But if you lack a support system, it can take a toll on your mental and emotional health,” she adds.

Aarti adds, “Science shows that it takes at least 90 days to change our thoughts, beliefs and habits. So, this is a cooling-off period for a person to recover and build a new life.”

getting into another relationship

According to Delhi-based mental health and relationship expert Ashmin Munjal, mentally preparing for a new relationship after a long-term relationship ends varies from person to person, depending on factors such as emotional healing, self-awareness, and readiness to move on.

“You may need more time to strengthen yourself, regain confidence, and establish emotional stability before you are fully ready for a new relationship. Some people jump into another relationship immediately after a breakup,” she says.

Meanwhile, Ruchi Ruh believes there is no set rule here, “You may feel you have resolved the emotional pain, worked on rebuilding yourself, and are ready to move on. Some people quickly enter other relationships because it gives them the support they need to heal.”

Munjal further explained that hastily entering into a new relationship after a long-standing breakup could be a sign of unresolved emotional issues and fear of being alone.

This may be an attempt to avoid the pain of the breakup by seeking validation and comfort in a new relationship.

This kind of behaviour can be a sign of underlying mental health problems such as anxiety or insecurity, so it’s important to consider these patterns and seek help if they interfere with your wellbeing.

“We often see people with an anxious attachment style quickly jump into new relationships, because it makes them feel secure and emotionally reassured. This can arise from an inability to be alone, low self-esteem, or even co-dependency,” says Ruh.

Aarti Chawla says that rushing into another relationship can be a sign of a lack of self-love. You should always love yourself enough to heal yourself and take care of your well-being, without looking for external validation to overcome insecurities.

Saying ‘I do’

Experts agree that getting married immediately after ending a long-term relationship can be a complex and personal decision.

While it is possible to find love again immediately after a breakup, it is essential to consider your emotional readiness and the reasons behind your decision.

“Getting married without fully understanding your feelings and healing from a previous relationship can create unresolved issues, unrealistic expectations and potentially harm your new partnership,” says Ashmin Munjal.

It’s important to make sure you’re entering a new relationship for the right reasons, not just as a reaction to past pain. Doing so will help lay a strong foundation for your future partnership.

Ruchi Ruh says, “Marriage is a huge commitment and requires two people to connect with each other beyond mere attraction. It requires mutual understanding, shared goals, respect and acceptance of each other’s past. Rushing into marriage without giving enough time after the honeymoon phase can lead to compatibility issues later on. While it may work out for some, others may regret their decision.”

before you leap

If you think you’ve found someone you want to spend your life with, ask yourself if you’re emotionally ready and if you’ve truly gotten over the pain of your last breakup.

You should also consider whether you still have feelings for your ex or want to reconcile. “Many people don’t ask themselves this question and end up regretting getting married, yet are still connected to their ex in some way,” says Ruh.

Remember, new relationships can feel exciting and energetic, but real relationships begin after the honeymoon phase is over. Ask yourself if the person you are with is really the person you want to spend your life with. You should also assess your compatibility and shared goals as a couple.

It is equally important to understand what your motive is behind pursuing a new relationship and whether this motive arises from satisfaction or fear.

Although your feelings are important, you are not alone in the relationship. Make sure your emotional readiness matches your partner’s emotional readiness.