Former Google employee Shao Chun Chen has opened up about the emotional impact of being fired from his job, describing the sleepless nights, anxiety and ultimately soul-searching he went through following the unexpected end of his time at the tech giant. Has shared his journey from. In an interview with Business Insider, Chen explained how the layoffs, which took place on Valentine’s Day 2024, a day before his 38th birthday, deeply affected him both personally and professionally.

Chen joined Google in 2016 as an account manager for Singapore advertisers and later took on the role of head of small business ad sales for the Singapore, Malaysia, Indonesia and Pakistan markets. After working for Google for eight years, he described his time there not just as a job but as a relationship that had become an integral part of his identity. “Emotionally, it was hard,” Chen said. “My initial reaction was pain and anger, driven by ego.” Chen revealed that he also compared himself to those who were not fired, which further increased his distress as he questioned why he was singled out for firing despite his loyalty and experience.

The suddenness of the layoffs, compounded by the fact that the company quickly moved on, left Chen struggling with feelings of grief. He admitted to spending many sleepless nights and going into shock while reading the news. During the two months Google gave him to find another role within the company, Chen became nervous, and applied for any available position in a desperate attempt to remain a part of the organization. Even when senior leaders approached him with job offers, Chen ultimately turned them down, feeling they were not suitable. “When I turned them down, every part of my body was trembling,” he recalled.

To deal with the emotional stress, Chen took a solo snowboarding trip to Japan, where he sought solace in the mountains. He described waking up at night with tears, realizing that as he gave himself space to heal, his body had entered recovery mode. This period of introspection inspired him to start sharing his story on YouTube, where he aimed to help others who were going through similar challenges. His transparency impressed the audience, some of whom expressed that his words affected them more than the advice of their own physicians.

Since then, Chen has started a coaching and consulting business, in addition to teaching at the National University of Singapore. Although his current earnings don’t match what he made during his time at Google, he appreciates the flexibility and new sense of purpose it has brought to his post-layoff life. Talking about his eight-year career at Google, he also revealed that he increased his income from $80,000 to almost $300,000.