It usually starts with a statement that seems impossible to argue with. “Everyone in my class has a phone.” Sometimes it comes during school pick-up. Sometimes while sleeping. Sometimes right after a birthday party, where another kid proudly shows off a new smartphone. And suddenly, the argument enters your home. Your 10-year-old says he needs the phone to stay connected with friends. They say they’re the only ones who don’t have anyone. They tell you they feel neglected. You’re not sure what you’re more worried about: giving them a smartphone or making them feel left out. Because parenting today comes with a set of problems that previous generations never had to solve. There is no universal rule. Some children have smartphones in class 4. Others wait until high school. And almost every parent wonders if they’re getting it wrong. We imagined a situation that many families silently struggle with and asked: What would you do if your 10-year-old child wants a smartphone because “everyone has one”? Five moms share the decisions they made and what happened next. “I asked my son to show me who ‘everybody’ was” (Ankita, 36) For about three months, Ankita’s son repeated the same sentence. “Everyone has a phone except me.” One evening, he asked her to list the kids in her class who actually had smartphones. “We sat down and counted,” she says. Of the 28 students, only seven had personal devices. “He had the loudest kids confused with everyone else,” she says. Instead of buying the phone right away, Ankita allowed him to use the family tablet on weekends. “When we discussed it calmly the pressure went down.” His takeaway? “Children often say ‘everyone’ when they really mean some people.” “I gave her a deadline” (Rhea, 35) Rhea’s daughter wanted a smartphone before entering middle school. “She felt abandoned because her friends had WhatsApp groups.” Instead of saying no forever, Riya made a deal. “I told her she’d get a phone when she turned 13.” The family wrote the date on the calendar. “Surprisingly, getting a clear answer put an end to everyday debates.” Meanwhile, her daughter could use her mother’s phone to call friends. “Children often struggle more with uncertainty than with rules,” says Rhea. I bought the phone and regretted it. (Mona, 34) Meona gave her son a smartphone when he was 10 years old. “To be honest, I felt pressured by other parents.” Within a few months he saw changes. “He was watching videos late at night and constantly asking for more screen time.” Family dinners became difficult. Homework took more time. “We realized he wasn’t ready for the responsibility,” says Mona. Parents eventually implemented stricter rules, including keeping phones out of the bedroom. Megha says that she has no regrets in giving the technology. “But I wish we had discussed the limitations before we bought the phone rather than after,” she said. “My daughter taught me something” (Sneha, 37) When Sneha refused to buy the phone, she expected a long argument. Instead, her daughter asked: “Mom, how old were you when you got your first phone?” The conversation started becoming less about the device and more about growing up. “We talked about internet safety, social media and why even adults have a problem with screen time,” recalls Sneha. They eventually agreed on a shared family phone that could be used after homework. “The discussions became more important than the actual phone,” she says. Seha says many parents focus only on shopping but children are often looking for explanations. “The real issue wasn’t the phone” (Shalini, 35) Shalini’s son insisted that he needed a smartphone because all his friends had one. But after several conversations he came to know something else. “His classmates had a gaming group that he couldn’t join,” she said. The phone wasn’t the real problem. Was feeling left out. She arranged weekend play dates and allowed supervised gaming sessions on the family computer. “The demand for phones gradually disappeared,” recalls Shalini. Looking back, she says: “Sometimes children ask for a device when they are really seeking something to belong to.” So, what will you do? Will you buy the phone? Wait a few more years? Set conditions? Or try to understand what your child is really asking for? Because when a 10-year-old says, “Everyone has one,” the conversation is rarely about technology. It’s about friendship. It’s about fit. It’s about growing up in a world where childhood increasingly happens on screens. And perhaps the hardest part for parents is knowing that there is no perfect answer. Just whatever feels right for your family. So what will you do if your child also makes a similar demand in front of you? Write your feedback in the comment section below.