Bollywood actor Shabana Azmi recently revealed that she found it difficult to accept her inability to have children with her husband Javed Akhtar. The veteran actress, who celebrates her 74th birthday on September 18, spoke about how social pressures made her feel incomplete and described her reaction to these feelings.

while talking to Indian ExpressShabana Azmi, who has been married to Javed Akhtar for almost 40 years, shared that it is the ‘vulnerabilities that make you human’. She said, “It is tough to accept the fact that you cannot have children. Society makes you feel incomplete. You have to work hard to pull yourself out of it. But your self-realisation should come from your work.”

Shabana further added, “Women often measure self-worth by their relationships – how they perform as a wife, mother, daughter. For a man, this is not the yardstick of success – rather, it is his career, his work that gives him the most satisfaction. I believe this should apply to all genders.”

Shabana concludes, “Women have to overcome patriarchal expectations. This doesn’t mean becoming indifferent towards your duty, but rather making it more inclusive so that your partner respects it too.”

During the same interview, Shabana also opened up about her marriage with Javed Akhtar. When asked what is the one thing that is non-negotiable in a relationship, Shabana said, “Respect! Though you cannot demand respect, you have to earn it. Love keeps changing. Romance is the first thing that disappears with marriage. But you have to keep working at it – it is a process of constant adjustment. Togetherness, friendship, interest in each other and giving space to your partner are the most important. This is possible only with respect.”

Shabana and Javed got married in December 1984. Talking about films, Shabana was last seen in Karan Johar’s film Rocky Aur Rani Ki Prem Kahani.