Cycle-Breaking Parenting: Why the younger generation is re-writing the rules book

“It’s not that my parents have done something wrong or they did not love me. They gave me everything they could, and my father always used to be when I needed him. But he was not the kind of person who had openly expressed affection. I never doubted his love, but I never heard the words of encouragement as I liked.”

“Now, as a father of twin daughters, I want to separate. I want my girls to know without any doubt, that I am their biggest cheerleader, that I see them, give them importance, and celebrate them every day,”, 33, 33, said while reflecting their choice.

For parents like Sharma, shift is not about rejecting how they were raised, but consciously deciding about which parts of their upbringing they want to take forward and which patterns they want to leave behind.

The generation of today’s parents is more aware than the fact that their words, work, and even silence can shape their child’s own feeling. And while many people may have used with gentle parenting styles or, many times, bent into strict approaches, bicycle-breaking has emerged as a stable, intentional choice.

But what is really bicycle-breaking parenting, and why more and more parents are adopting it as their guide philosophy? Let’s find out from experts.

What is this?

Dr. Sushma Gopalan, Child Psychological – Child Life Specialist, Ester CMI Hospital, Bangalore, tells Today India“Cycle-breaking parenting is a style where parents consciously avoid repeating negative patterns from their own childhood. Instead of using rigorous discipline, neglect, or old beliefs, they focus on understanding, patience and emotional support.”

Dr. Gopalan states that young parents are choosing this approach to create a healthy family environment and raise children who feel safe, confident and love.

“They determine open communication, sympathy, and positive examples, breaking the cycle of injury or misunderstanding.”

For this, Delhi-based children and clinical psychological rosary Vohra Khanna said that understanding cycle-breaking parenting means that parents are consciously trying to break the old behavior pattern today.

For example, if a parents were raised in a strict environment, they now ensure that the same strictness is not repeated with their child. They are consciously choosing a different route. By doing this, the upbringing of their children becomes healthy.

With the increasing awareness of mental health and emotional welfare, more parents are adopting this parenting style for the creation of strong, happy and more connected families.

Parents are trying to break which cycle?

Parents practicing bicycle-breaking parenting want to stop repeating the negative patterns experienced in their childhood.

Dr. According to Gopalan, these chakras may include harsh discipline, constant criticism, emotional neglect, partiality or lack of communication.

She says that some parents want to break the pattern of stress, anger or unhealthy relationships that they were seen at home. Others focus on overpotting, controlling behavior, or preventing habits such as low emotional support.

“By identifying these harmful patterns, parents choose to respond with patience, understanding and encouragement instead. The goal is to create a positive environment, which breaks the series of previous emotional or practical challenges,” says Dr. Gopalan.

Meanwhile, more than ‘Kya’, Khanna focuses on ‘Why’. She shares that it is important to choose to break the cycle because it is your responsibility to give the next generation a healthy and nutrition environment.

Let’s talk about mental health

Experts feel that bicycle-breaking parenting has a positive effect on the mental health of children.

“When parents react with understanding, support and sympathy rather than repeating hard or neglected patterns, children feel safe and valuable. This helps them to create confidence, emotional flexibility and healthy copy skills,” says Dr. Gopalan.

If you give your child a place to openly express your feelings without fear of decision, it will reduce stress, anxiety and behavioral issues.

This will also help them develop strong relationships with you and their peers, and they will be less likely to carry forward negative emotional patterns in adulthood.

Overall, bicycle-breaking parenting creates a nutritional environment that supports mental welfare and long-term emotional stability for children.

Are parents just dealing with their trauma?

While this parenting style is partly a way to address their own childhood experiences for parents, it is more than that, Dr. Shares Gopalan.

“Some parents can use it to heal with previous trauma, but the main goal is to create a healthy environment for their children. They focus on understanding, patience and emotional support rather than repeating negative patterns.

Meanwhile, Khanna tells us that when parents become more aware, the level of stress decreases and anxiety is better managed. Healthy communication is promoted, and parents start working on their emotional intelligence.

This not only benefits them, but also ensures that the coming generations grow with more emotional intelligence, flexibility, problem-solution abilities and strong emotional regulation.

There are challenges

Parents who choose bicycle-breaking parenting often find it beneficial, but it comes with challenges.

• They must constantly know about their tasks to avoid falling back into old habits.
• Many parents feel guilty or uncertain when trying new approaches that feel unfamiliar.
• Feelings such as anxiety, restlessness, or previous trauma can sometimes return the old pattern.
• It can be difficult to balance patience with discipline; In an attempt not to be very strict, some parents can give too much freedom, which can also be harmful.
• Family or community criticism to not follow traditional methods can make it even more difficult, and living continuously every day can make it feel tired.

What are the shortcomings?

Dr. For Gopalan, there are some shortcomings in this parenting style. He feels that this time can be taken and emotionally demanding, as parents need constant self-confidence and patience.

“Some children can take advantage of boundaries if boundaries are not clear. Also, parents may feel crime or stress when they constantly struggle to maintain this approach. It can also cause tension with family members who follow traditional parenting methods.”

Before you try it

• Self-conscious: Reflect on your own habits, triggers and reactions. Understanding your pattern helps prevent repeating negative behaviors and ensures that your reactions to your child are intentional, not automated.
• Stay consistent and balanced: Apply rules, routines and boundaries so that your child feels safe. At the same time, balance the discipline with emotional support to promote confidence and healthy emotional development.
• Practice patience and sympathy: Children test and make mistakes. Reply with patience and sympathy rather than despair helps them to learn, understand and develop emotional intelligence.
• Encourage open communication and flexibility: Create a safe place for children to express emotions and ideas. Be prepared to customize your approach when needed, understand that each child is unique and various strategies may be required.
• Look for support and practice self-care: Parenting can be sought, especially when breaking old cycles. Look for guidance from books, masters, or help groups, and make sure you take care of your own mental and emotional welfare to stay patient and effective.

Ground level

One reason is that bicycle -breaking parenting has become so popular, because it is actually about choosing what you want to do next from your childhood and what you want to leave.

It is patient, being helpful and ensuring that your children feel love and safe all the time. While this parenting style comes with a set of its own challenges, it will help you to create a strong bond with your child and make them emotionally safe and confident.

By balanced the rules with love, keeping on, and also take care of yourself, you can break the old pattern and give your children a healthy, happy start in life.